Monday, June 26
hmmmm... ='(
actually lotsa things had happened between me and hendra..
ya i know i told ya'll that we's broken up.
we did. or did not..
i dunno..
but it's just hard for me to let go of him.
even though i know there are better guys out there for me.
ya i love him..
despite of all de shits and pain he caused,
i just can't change my feelings towards him.
i know perhaps i will lose him one day.
but i'm just not ready for a separation..
i dunno what's goin on in my life now.
i just need him by my side..
i just can't turn to others..
although me and him weren't together for that long,
the bond is strong.
i just love him..
for who he is.
right now i'm numb.
i just can't think of anythin else to do
but to sit alone in de dark and cry.
only God knows what i'm actually feeling inside.
like what i told him before,
i'm not prepared for separation..
but i'm prepared to go against all odds to be with him.
we're just two worlds apart..
that's why i'm prepared to give all i have or even more for him..
but sometimes i just feel unappreciated for what i've done for him all this while.
sometimes, somehow,
he kinda reminds me of hasrul
and myself.
he reminds me of hasrul coz both of them don't show enough.
and i don't wanna break up wit him just becoz of that..
i don't want it to be like me and hasrul last time.
however, if separation is the only way,
then i will let him go sincerely
although it'd be like killin myself.
for his happiness i'm willing to do anythin..
even if it means of lettin him go.
but sometimes i wonder if he thinks of me the way i do..
if he worries about me the way i do..
if he loves me the way i do.
but at the end of the day..
it'll just be me who turn and give in to him.
sighs.. in tears.
::triple choc cookie::
chocolate-spongecake @ 4:56 PM
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